For families suffering the loss of a child, the festive season can be bittersweet – with many reporting they are uncertain how to include their child meaningfully when signing Christmas cards.
In a heartfelt initiative, Derian House Children’s Hospice has been offering bereaved families a way to include their child’s name beside theirs – with a personalised name stamp completely free of charge.
The charity, based in Astley Village, Chorley, has sent out 261 stamps to grieving families across the UK – from as far as London – extending its support way beyond those who use Derian House services and to anyone who has suffered the loss of a child.
The stamp project, now in its second year, was inspired by Derian father Richard Cornes who created a stamp for his daughter Sally – who passed away aged 14 after a brave battle with cancer.
“I created a special stamp for Sally that I can use to acknowledge that she is still part of our family,” said Richard, of Chorley.
“It is an ‘S’ with a heart, and in her favourite colour, purple. Since we started adding it when signing our names, family and friends have started adding it when addressing cards to us. Now others have started doing the same.”
Derian House’s stamp project was launched last year as part of the hospice’s “Say My Child’s Name” campaign, which aims to break the silence around child loss.
Partnering with a specialist stamp-maker, Derian House covers the full cost of £13.50 per stamp through generous donations, ensuring this remains completely free to grieving families.
This year, local truck manufacturers, Leyland Trucks, donated enough money for Derian House to provide another 100 stamps for bereaved families.
Joe McGuigan, whose daughter Lianne used Derian House, said: “This is a lovely idea and so welcome. We lost our daughter Lianne suddenly 18 years ago and still struggle with the day to day challenge of mentioning her name.”
Derian mum Niomi Wilkinson added: “Before this I used to draw a star instead of his name but this is a beautiful idea. It really does soothe such painful grief.”
Jackie Wade, whose son Tom used Derian House, said: “I absolutely love this idea as writing cards without Tom’s name feels so wrong and painful.”
The hospice has also received moving feedback from families from across the UK who do not use Derian House’s services, but were also offered the hand of friendship and support from the charity.
Aimee Beaumont, mum of Freddie, from Oxford, said: “My little boy Freddie died suddenly three weeks after his first birthday. It’s such a lovely and thoughtful idea. Thank you so much, what a lovely idea at such a hard time of year.”
Gemma Pasquill, mum of Lily Rose, from Bolton, said: “This is a beautiful and thoughtful idea as a bereaved parent for years I have always had a debate with myself every time I wrote a card as to whether I write my daughter’s name. It would always make me feel guilty, like I was letting her down not writing her name so thank you so much for this.”
Melissa Markwell, mum of Xander, from Bangor, County Down, said: “My son, Xander, passed away last summer and I’ve struggled with how to include him meaningfully in cards. I absolutely love your stamp idea. Thank you for doing such a lovely thing for bereaved families in memory of our precious children.”
Lauren Caulfield, mum of Grace, of Manchester, said: “You are doing something truly amazing and I am so grateful to you! Last Christmas I didn’t know what to do because I wanted to include Grace but didn’t know how to or what people would think so I didn’t and it broke my heart. What a beautiful thing you’re doing!”
Karen Edwards OBE, Chief Executive of Derian House Children’s Hospice, said: “By offering a free personalised stamp to all of our Derian families, and to bereaved families across the UK, we hope we can help bring them some comfort this Christmas.
“We are passionate about breaking down barriers and opening up the conversation around child loss at Derian House. We are committed to spreading the Say my Child’s Name message, not only to help our families, but also to provide a useful resource for the general public and professionals.”
Derian House, based in Chorley, Lancashire, cares for more than 400 seriously ill babies, children, young people and their families from across the North West helping them to make the most of every moment.
